After today's 0-0 draw at the Lane against Everton the Tottenham Twitter fans are out in full force. As much as we hate to admit it, our fan base has our share of stupidity. So without further delay, read the five diseases of stupid Spurs fans out there today and how to diagnose yourself as one. If you are suffering from any of these conditions please seek help immediately.
1. PochOutitus- Those suffering with this affliction constantly find themselves complaining about a lack of Plan B and frequently romanticize past relationships; particularly with AVB and Harry Redknapp. Symptoms often occur one with Levy Out and an obsession with 4 4 2. The best treatment plan is to listen to interviews with Brendan Rogers and look at Arsene Wenger photos until your view of Poch has clarified.
2. LevyOut Disorder- Characterized by obsessions with net spends and backing the manager this is most frequently found as a chronic condition. Often patients will find themselves obsessed with money and upon occasion, anti-Semitic. Best course of treatment is to study the history of Leeds United.
3. OneYearWonderaphobia- Poor souls suffering from this acute condition find themselves obsessed with Harry Kane and his conversion rate. They will annoy those close to them with blind attention on results and no attention to the subtle aspects of process. This condition latches on to Spurs fans suddenly and is usually transmitted from jealous fans of other clubs. The condition can only be cured by consistent Kane goals from open play.
4. Champions League Syndrome- Fans suffering from CLS are prone to flashbacks from the past and mutterings about what could have been. Patients are unable to gain enjoyment in their day to day lives and have their minds entirely consumed by League Table positon. There is no cure for CLS but it can be treated with too 4 finishes or Europa League titles.
5. Closet Arsenalitis- There is no treatment or cure. If you feel you may be suffering from this condition pursue euthanasia immediately to protect your loved ones.
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